Secret to Getting Closer to God

Q: You say that our relationship with God is the most important thing. How can I get closer to Him?” - Lance W.


A: As it is with any relationship, you have to really work at it. In fact, it’s a lot like marriage. Well, actually, that’s the entire purpose of marriage. Marriage is supposed to teach us about our relationship with God. The bible even refers to us as the “bride of Christ”. He has courted us by showing us His love, and paid the price for us just like the Israelites used to do.

It’s common in many cultures for a suitor to go to the father of the woman he wishes to marry and pay him a price for the privilege of being able to marry her. That price could be money or it could be something like a lamb or livestock. Jesus became the sacrificial lamb of God to pay the price to the Father so that we may be His bride. He’s done all the preparation for us, all we have to do is accept His proposal.

Then, just like Israelites did, He has been preparing a place for us to live and when the time is right He will come back with trumpets and fanfare and pick us up to take us to that home. That home, of course, is Heaven.

"are we there yet?"

“are we there yet?”

Even sex was created by God to show us an illustration of the intimacy we will have with Him in heaven. It may sound strange to us because of how dirty our culture has made sex out to be, but sex is a spiritual thing. And believe it or not, God should be a part of it! In fact, the book “Song of Solomon” is a very intimate love letter that’s meant to symbolize a love letter from Christ to His bride…US! That’s why it’s in the bible.

The reason why a virgin sheds blood on her wedding night is that it is symbolic of a blood covenant, just like the blood covenant that God made with Abraham. Jesus being sacrificed on the cross is the fulfillment of that blood covenant. And Jesus shed blood on the cross for us all which could be taken as a blood covenant with us.

This is why God is so serious about sex and keeping it pure. And it’s why God is so serious about not committing adultery. He is so serious about it that back in the old law He commanded that anyone who committed adultery be killed! That’s why Jesus is so strict about divorce. Jesus said that anyone who divorces his wife for any reason except marital unfaithfulness, and remarries, has committed adultery.

"...wait, what?"

“…wait, what?”

He also said that when we marry, God joins us together in one flesh. And what God makes one, let no man separate!

So, when we commit sexual sin we are committing a very serious sin against what is supposed to be a representation of our intimacy with God. And when we are unfaithful in our marriage or we get a divorce, we are destroying what is supposed to be the representation of His relationship with us.

When we put anything above God, even if it’s our family, children, or even our own survival and comfort, then we are committing adultery in our relationship with God. We are cheating on Him!

God is forgiving of us because of Jesus’ sacrifice, but our relationship with God is very fragile, just like our relationship with our spouse. If you don’t work at it, the relationship will fall apart. Just like marriage, it requires a daily commitment! It requires spending time together every day, communicating, being open and honest with each other, allowing yourself to be completely intimate and vulnerable, trusting each other completely, and putting up bounderies to protect your relationship from infidelity.

Imagine if your spouse wrote you a bunch of important love letters and you never read them? What if you were so busy that you never spent time with her? What if you never answered her calls? What if you never told her that you loved her? What if you completely ignored her when you were together? What if you acted like she wasn’t even there?

"I'd divorce him! .....oh, wait..."

“I’d divorce him! ….oh, wait…”

Well, the same is true of our relationship with God. He gave us the bible, which is His word, and His gift to us, yet most people never read it. We’re so busy that we don’t spend time with Him. He wants to tell and show us things, but we don’t seek Him or look for them. He loves us more than anyone has ever loved anything, yet how often do we tell Him that we love Him? And even though He’s with us all the time, we completely ignore Him.

Now, I’m going to let you in on an incredible secret. This will completely revolutionize your relationship with God, and it’s something that sadly doesn’t get talked about much. But, it’s one of the most important things in life!

Strive to be constantly aware of God’s presence.

That’s it!

God is always with you. He loves you so much that He’s fascinated by you and adores you. He can’t take His eyes off you! He hangs on every word you say! But, even though He’s always with us, how often are we aware of it? It’s like He’s always around us hoping to catch eye contact with us, but we act like He’s not even there.

Imagine you had an invisible friend who set on your shoulder all day. All you had to do was catch each other’s eyes to communicate because he knew what you were thinking. When something good happened, you just had to make eye contact and you’re both like “ah yeah!”… or something bad happened and you just have to make eye contact like “are you serious?” or “can you believe that?” and He looks back like “I know!!!”.

Pictured: an invisible friend.

Pictured: an invisible friend.

We should be that way with God! When something good happens, tell Him thank you. When you’re upset about something, tell Him! When you need help, ask. It doesn’t matter why you’re communicating with Him, He just wants more than just about anything for you to catch His eye and acknowledge His existence!

Don’t hide anything from Him, be completely open, honest, intimate, and vulnerable with Him. That can be hard for many people to do, but there’s no one more trustworthy than God. Open up about your mistakes and failures. Admit the terrible things you’ve done. Admit that there are things you can’t do, that you aren’t good enough. Tell Him about your fears, worries, and concerns. When you’re angry, tell Him. When you’re angry at HIM, tell Him. He can take it!

And be sure to tell Him that you love Him at least once a day! It sounds like a little thing, but it makes a big difference, I promise!

The parallels between Marriage and our relationship with God are incredible and go on and on. Remember that! When something about marriage stumps you, think about how it relates to our relationship with God and that will help shed light on what you should do and how it should work. And, in the same way, if something about our relationship with God stumps you, just think about how it relates to marriage and it will help you understand what’s going on and what you should do. That’s why God created marriage!

If you have trouble remembering that He’s with you, it helps to pick something that you encounter throughout each day to be a reminder. Some people choose the act of picking up their phone and turning it on, or looking at their watch as a reminder. So, every time they pick up their phone, for instance, they will be reminded that God is with them at that very moment so they can acknowledge it. Or, if you need something a little less subtle, you can tie a string on your finger or wear a rubberband around your wrist. Be creative! Whatever you choose, whenever you see it or feel it, remember that God is with you and take the opportunity to catch His eye and tell Him that you love Him.

And let this be your first reminder, God’s with you right now! So, maybe you should catch His eye and tell Him how much you love Him.

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- Jim Graham
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